I'd be careful...

Dear Frug,

The advice you gave me about taking a dump in my owners shoes was not a very good idea. I found out very fast that my idiot owner actualy does have some beast mastery after all.
I have to admit it was funny watching the expression as my idiot put her shoe on in the morning, but all of a sudden I found myself being dragged by the scruff of my neck and getting my nose shoved into the shoe which I left my big surprise in. Now how would you feel if your idiot shoved your face in your own poo???!! Then the next thing I know .... my idiot owner is giving 50 silver pieces to some vender in Wetlands and gets The Daily Aggramar Transcript and rolls the paper up and proceeds who whack me on the butt while yelling "Bad Panzer! Bad Bad Bad Panzer!" I am begining to think my idiot owner maybe a bit more intellegent than your lazy butt idiot. GRRRR...-Panzer

Panzer, what I'm thinkin is that your owner is actually more interested in you than you realize and might just..well, like it rough. All that "Bad Panzer" stuff makes me think she's into a little different roleplaying.

Sleep with your back to the wall.

Frug